Retrospective Wedding Planning Tips

Now that the wedding is over and I can happily say that it went off without a hitch, I have a few more helpful wedding planning tips to share!

- Use your family and friend's gifts and talents.  We really made our wedding a friend and family affair when it came to all of the details.  We loved being able to display the talents of our loved ones and using so many friends and family members in our wedding lightened the load for us. There was no guessing game when it came to whether or not most of our vendors would be up to our standards, because we had a close relationship with so many people involved.  We were able to relax and trust that our outcome would be everything we hoped for.  We really couldn't have asked for a more trusted group of people to make our day a reality.

• My cousins, Ashley and Chris, did our photography, and my uncle took video.  Ash's website is linked on this post.
• My aunt and younger cousins helped with our polaroid guest book.  Which was SO FUN! 
• My little sister's dear friend, Lauren, made our beautiful and delicious cake! (Her website is also linked in the post above.) 
  

How amazing is this cake?!

• My mother-in-law made all of our wedding favors (homemade strawberry jam! Delicious!)
• My father-in-law handmade our seating card holders, which fit perfectly with our fall tree theme. 
  
  
  

Seating Cards!

• Our flowers were done by a local flower shop that has provided flowers to many family events over the years. They treated us like family and did a beautiful job.  It took me until two weeks after the wedding, when my flowers were beyond dead, to finally throw them away because I loved them so much!
• Our wedding was held in the church I grew up in and where my parents were married almost 35 years ago! Our reverend has been with our church since I was in middle school, has led my sisters and I through countless Bible studies, mission trips, and conferences, and is a trusted leader and gifted speaker.

- If your bridesmaids are spread throughout the country like mine were, the website Weddington Way is a great resource.  This website allows your bridesmaids to all order the same dresses no matter where in the world they live.  You can create a "showroom" where you select all of your favorite dresses and your girls can comment on the ones they like best.  Weddington Way offered great deals and had amazing customer service whenever I needed it. (Although one of my bridesmaids said she had trouble with their customer service, so take from that what you will).  We did have one sort of major issue with Weddington Way.  A couple of the girls used the sizing chart on the website to choose their dress size and did not take advantage of the website's policy that allows you to order and try on a dress prior to purchasing it... their dresses were much to big when they arrived!  (Weddington Way has been kind enough to reimburse them some of the money for their alterations because of the mixup.)

- We used the website vistaprint to order our wedding stationery in bulk for very cheap! Vistaprint has premade designs or allows you to use your own design or pictures.  Chuck designed our save-the-dates using the website and we ordered 250 of them for about $40 including shipping.  Most companies that specifically sell wedding stationery would cost upwards of $200 for that many save-the-date cards.

-Have your partner help with the planning! (Chuck specifically asked me to add this one, I swear!) Having a partner to do 50% of the work made my life so much easier, especially with my work and grad school schedules.  Chuck genuinely enjoyed being a part of the planning process and being able to incorporate his own ideas into the wedding.  He tends to be much more timely than I am when it comes to planning and made sure that things were done way ahead of time, leaving us with much less stress in the final weeks.  I think allowing Chuck to have a say in much of the wedding made it a more sentimental day for both of us!

Anything I missed? What did you find to be a helpful resource when you were planning your wedding?

The Final Stretch of the Engagement

This last month has been a whirlwind.

Truthfully, the whole engagement has seemed incredibly fast, but this month especially.  The fall has been going so quickly, as I have settled in at a new internship that keeps me very busy, changed around my work schedule, and, of course, been tying up all the loose ends of wedding planning.  So I apologize for my lack of blogging for anyone who is reading out there.  I know there are at least a couple of you.

Throughout the engagement, people have asked me if I've been stressed, and the answer has always been no.  Not even a little.  I have adored the process of wedding planning and I have had an equal partner throughout the journey to carry half of the weight as well as countless family members pitching in.  However, these last few weeks have truly begun to be stressful, because Chuck and I both have so little time in a day between all of our school/work commitments and the pressure is on to get things completed within 16 days or fewer.  (Even as I type that number, it doesn't feel real, because I have so many obligations here in Michigan for work and school between now and then.) Yikes!

This week alone has yielded two emotional breakdowns, which is two more than I've had in this 11-month-long wedding planning process so far.  Both were handled so gracefully by my husband-to-be, who wisely steps in to help resolve the situation without trying to take over, knowing that forcing me to give up total control will only end in more stress on my part. (I'm generally laidback, but when I'm in the midst of something, I have to finish it the way I intended to and passing the torch is anxiety-inducing.  Thanks to my mom for those control freak genes.)  As we travel closer and closer to the alter, I am constantly reaffirmed in this decision to marry Chuck.

I have to remind myself that even if the seating charts are all messed up and the music isn't perfect (the sources of this weeks meltdowns), we will be spending a day in communion with the people we love the most.  People will be fed, loved on, and appreciated so deeply.  And nothing else matters.  After all this preparation, in two weeks, 200+ of you crazy people will gather and celebrate this sweet love we have found. Wow!

How blessed we are.

Five Tips for Wedding Planning That are Actually Helpful

When you first get engaged, people will shower you with (often unsolicited/unwanted/unhelpful) advice.  But, as a new bride-to-be you will also be hungry for tips and helpful hints for wedding planning that will make the process easier. I wouldn't say I'm an expert, but Chuck and I like to think we're pretty good at this whole wedding planning thing. (We will see come wedding day if it all falls apart!)

So, whether you're newly engaged or single and hope to get married someday, Chuck and I want to share with you a few things we've learned about wedding planning so far.  This is my own piece of unsolicited, maybe unwanted, but hopefully helpful advice for you.

1. Do not have expectations of perfection.  You are setting yourself up for disappointment and unwanted stress.  Magazines, websites, tv shows, etc. will advertise "How to Have Your Dream Celebrity-Style Wedding."  It's not going to happen... it's just not.  As long as you are married to your favorite person on earth at the end of the day, you've had the perfect wedding.  Be flexible about everything else. And, if your spouse-to-be isn't your favorite person on earth, reconsider getting married at all! You're stuck with them for the rest of forever.

Sidenote: people might tell you horror stories about all the horrible things that went wrong at their own wedding or a wedding they read about once on the internet.  Just ignore them.  They're jealous meanies who want to steal your joy. The crazy things they tell you probably won't happen on your day anyway.

2. Some details are more important than others, whether you like it or not.  It is important to incorporate aspects of your religion, personalities, family members, and other personal touches that are meaningful to you.  It is generally not important what your favors are, what jewelry your wear, centerpieces look like, your cake flavor, or even what you serve for dinner.  Every single person I've asked cannot recall more than one of those details from weddings they have attended in the past.  DO NOT STRESS OVER THEM!  Yes, you should have those things, but you should not make them a primary concern in your planning.  Put something pretty-ish on the tables, feed the people, and have a great party!

3. Join theknot.com.  It does everything- maps out your to-dos in chronological order for you, allows you to track your guest list and RSVPs, helps you map out your seating chart, create a wedding website, and is full of inspirational pictures and tips.  And it's FREE!

4. BUY STAMPS! Buy all of the stamps.  Ask for stamps for your birthday, Christmas, Halloween, whatever.  You will never have enough. Between sending save-the-dates, invites, RSVP cards, rehearsal invites, and thank you notes to everyone you've ever known, you will need all the stamps you can get.  No one told me this before I started wedding planning!  With the number of stamps we've used in the last few months, I can't believe no one has mentioned it before.

5. Make a document of all of the addresses you need in an address label template on Word.  Every time you need to send one of the above documents, print the addresses on sticky labels and set up an assembly line of sticking on addresses and stamps with your partner.  You don't want to hand write 200 addresses every time.  Trust me.

I'm sure I'll have many more tips after the wedding day, but for now, these five tips have kept me sane.  And I wish someone had told me before I started planning.

Any brides-to-be or newlyweds out there with other helpful hints?  What's keeping you sane during your planning process?  I'd love to hear your tips. Solicited advice.